A Gift Worth Sharing

A Reflection on the First Reading for September 26th, 2021:
Twenty-Sixth Sunday in Ordinary Time

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Numbers
11.25-29

The Lord came down in the cloud, took some of the spirit that was on Moses and put it on the seventy elders. When the spirit rested upon them, they prophesied. But they did not do so again.

Two men remained in the camp, one named Eldad, and the other named Medad, and the spirit rested on them; they were among those registered, but they had not gone out to the tent, and so they prophesied in the camp. A young man ran and told Moses, “Eldad and Medad are prophesying in the camp.”

Joshua son of Nun, the assistant of Moses, one of his chosen men, said, “My lord Moses, stop them!” But Moses said to him, “Are you jealous for my sake? Would that all the Lord’s people were Prophets, and that the Lord would put his spirit on them!”
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There came a point in my faith journey when I suddenly realized what it meant to be chosen by God. It was coupled with an appreciation of the bountifulness of God’s generosity to all His chosen people and that we’re all receiving something incredibly wonderful — and more of it than any of us could possibly imagine (through no merit of our own).

My initial response to this revelation was gratitude mingled with guilt. Knowing that I didn’t do anything to deserve it, how could I fully enjoy it when I knew so many others never would? It didn’t seem fair to me that I should be chosen and others weren’t. But rather than blame God for not choosing them, I felt His response to my moral dilemma was something along the lines of, “There is nothing stopping you from sharing with them what I’m giving to you.”

Unfortunately, this is not the beginning of the story of a great evangelist. For the most part, I consider myself among those who find it difficult to bring up His name among non-believers. I can appreciate that nearly everyone has a history with God, even if it’s simply based on the Church’s reputation, and I often doubt the persuasiveness of my own lived experiences to convert them.

More often than not, I remain silent, praying that through my other endeavours, I am leaving enough material for God to work with to touch the hearts of others. Not just through volunteer work at church, but also in my everyday life. I imagine that if I can be gentle, patient, and compassionate with others, I might be able to convey to them, in a small and imperfect way, the love that God has for them — even if I’m not entirely successful at being virtuous. Even if they don’t understand what I’m trying to share with them now, my hope is that one day they will, under the framework of ‘the one who reaps and another who sows’ (John 4:37).

While understanding that His grace is free and not entirely dependent on my actions, I still sometimes feel guilty that I don’t speak enough about Him explicitly. However, I’m starting to notice my enthusiasm to talk about Him is tightly tethered to how excited I am about what it is that He’s giving me. ‘My desire to convert others’ is really just another way of saying, ‘my desire to share with others the gift that I’m receiving.’ And that gift, in my own words, is to one day be united not only with God, but so many others who fully know, accept, and love me.

The trick may be to keep this at the forefront of my mind, which most people will agree is not an easy thing to do during the grind of daily life. However, I believe being chosen by God is a gift that most people are desperately searching for, and it’s a wonderful feeling to know that it’s one that I can share with them.



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Laura Dysart

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