Ego Aside

A Reflection on the Gospel for October 27th, 2019:
Thirtieth Sunday in Ordinary Time

Luke 18.9-14

Jesus told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and regarded others with contempt:

“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, was praying thus, ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people: thieves, rogues, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give a tenth of all my income.’

“But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even look up to heaven, but was beating his breast and saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’

“I tell you, this man went down to his home justified rather than the other; for whoever exalts himself will be humbled, but whoever humbles himself will be exalted.”

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When my son was six years old, he nearly won a race. It was sports day at school and James was running for the Red team. If the Red team won, valuable points would go toward a much coveted trophy.


As a doting Mom, I was of course on the sidelines along with my other Mommy friends ready to cheer James on. The pistol went off and the little ones ran. True to form, James was fast, but the little girl in the next lane was gaining on him. Suddenly the little girl fell. She didn’t look hurt but to my horror James stopped and started to cross his lane to help her up. All the Moms (myself included) yelled at James, “James run! Don’t stop, run!” My little son was confused. He looked at me and the other moms gesticulating for him to move. For a moment he didn’t know what to do. Then he did as he was told and he ran — but he didn’t run as fast. His joy was gone.


When I reflect on this episode, I still remember the consternation written all over his little face. Today as a Christian, I regret my attitude then, because in this case my little boy with his undeveloped, non-adult ego was reflecting Jesus in a beautiful way. He was willing to put his ego aside, along with earthly praise and glory to help the little girl in the lane next to him.


In Luke 18:9-14 Jesus speaks of pride and humility. Saint Augustine believed that all sin is twisted good. So it is with pride. My adult ego pridefully fears rejection. I need community and I need love. This is a good desire because God wants me to be part of a loving community, but the twisted good occurs when I become so caught up in my own friendships I fail to notice the person in the lane next to me who could use a friend because they have been hurt, brushed aside, or left out. During these times I need/want to cross over to the other lane to allow the Christ in me to be Christ for them. I need to do this because I have been in that place of rejection. You see, when I couldn’t love myself, God lifted me out of a pit of darkness and showed me that despite my deep hurt and failures I have worth and purpose. When I keep my eyes on Jesus I am able to share this experience with others. This treasure of mine, however, is in a clay pot (2 Cor 4:7). I fall regularly so I need Christians to pray for me, come along side me, support me, love me, and encourage me in my Christian journey. A Christian community is not a clique, because Jesus died for the outsider; the Samaritan woman and the tax collector. In the terms of today, He died for the least “fun” person we know. He died for you and He died for me.


​Liz Galsworthy

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