Even as We Hope in You

A Reflection on the Psalm for October 17th, 2021:
Twenty-Ninth Sunday in Ordinary Time

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Psalm 33

R. Let your love be upon us, Lord, even as we hope in you.

The word of the Lord is upright, and all his work is done in faithfulness. He loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of the steadfast love of the Lord. 

R. Let your love be upon us, Lord, even as we hope in you.

Truly the eye of the Lord is on those who fear him, on those who hope in his steadfast love, to deliver their soul from death, and to keep them alive in famine. 

R. Let your love be upon us, Lord, even as we hope in you.

Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and shield. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you. 

R. Let your love be upon us, Lord, even as we hope in you.

For me, hope is the chink in my armour: the little pathway that connects the outside world with the hub of my soul where all of my deepest desires reside. Hope dashed is heartbreaking, and, in my mind, associated with ridicule because of the vulnerability involved with acknowledging to myself and others the things that I really wanted and failed to receive.

For that reason, living without hope is surprisingly easy. It makes me feel strong and in control, because I don’t even have to admit that I have any deep desires at all! I become adept at compromise and optimistic, knowing that I will be content no matter what life throws at me because, in a twisted way, I’m indifferent to it all.

However, as the responsorial psalm this week clearly states, as Christians, we are called to be hopeful people. And not hopeful in just anything — we’re expected to place all our hope in God.
God is the exception to the rule: He doesn’t plan on giving us what we expect, He plans on giving us more than we could ever dream of receiving. And He expects us to believe Him when He tells us that, and believing it means living with hope.

Needless to say, this has been a challenge for me. It has required me to examine all the ways that I’ve misplaced my hope in the past, and present, and set hope properly where it belongs: on Him. I’ve had to learn to deconstruct the expectations and judgements I’ve placed on certain moments of my life, and embrace a long-term vision of my journey. One based on a narrative that expunges shame and regret as I choose to believe that everything that has happened, is happening, and will happen, is being used to bring me to my intended, inevitable, and joyful destination.

Living with hope is not without its struggles. There’s a clear temptation to blame God for all the bad things that happen, but I’ve found that when I interpret difficult and unpleasant moments as opportunities to exercise my trust and faith in Him and His promises, it helps me to persevere through them. When I do this, I can step out of those moments feeling confident in our relationship.

Even when I fail, there are still beautiful moments of grace as I once more come to appreciate the magnitude of His unconditional love and faithfulness. He doesn’t abandon us in our dark moments, even when we abandon Him. Funnily enough, brushing myself off and starting over again is yet another way to deepen my relationship with God.

The biggest struggle, however, has been learning to relax and really rest, knowing that nothing will ever overcome me. I don’t have to be constantly on edge worrying about what’s waiting for me around the corner, and whether or not I’ll be able to handle it. Living with hope means I can rest in knowing that the Lord will see me through this moment, and the next, because He loves me.




Laura Dysart

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