Personal Goal Reset

A Reflection on the Second Reading for April 7th, 2019:
Fifth Sunday of Lent

​Philippians 3.8-14

Brothers and sisters: I regard everything as loss because of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things, and I regard them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but one that comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God based on faith.

I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the sharing of his sufferings by becoming like him in his death, if somehow I may attain the resurrection from the dead.

Not that I have already obtained this or have already reached the goal; but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own.

Brothers and sisters, I do not consider that I have made it my own; but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus.

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It seems like we are always striving. Our world celebrates and rewards a strong work ethic, a do-it-yourself-er, a self-made person. We’re told that life is a journey and we’ve each oriented our lives to achieve or attain something along the way. It might be status, success, pleasure, security, approval, money, relationships, and the list goes on. Many of the things we are striving for are not bad things, but they can be fickle and disappointing destinations for our lives.

Our hopes, our dreams, our plans for our lives can all come crashing down in a moment — with an unexpected medical diagnosis, an abrupt end to a relationship, a phone call with surprising news, a market dip, or a slip on the ice. Life is so fragile. I know this is true. And yet, I spend a lot of time ignoring this fact — making my own plans, building my own dreams, and carrying on like I was in charge. But we can’t quite ignore the precarious nature of our lives during lent. It’s a season that encourages us to look at our own fragility, our own mortality. We begin with Ash Wednesday, a day where we are quite literally reminded that, despite all our strivings, in the grand scheme of things we really are just dust. Lent’s an invitation to reorient our lives, to recalibrate the direction we are headed in.

"Lent’s an invitation to reorient our lives, to recalibrate the direction we are headed in." 

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Saint Paul is also working towards a goal. But that goal is not a thing to attain, it’s a person to know. It’s Jesus Christ. I tend to mix this up more often than I’d like to admit. Without realizing it, I can find myself trying to strive and work to be good enough to earn God’s love. But that’s not how it works. God’s love is a gift — given because of who He is, not because of what we do. I remember the first time I discovered the difference. One night I was consumed by self-doubt, thinking, “I can’t do this. I’m not good enough to be a follower of Christ. I’m so inadequate.” While I was sitting alone thinking about this, I was filled with an overwhelming sense of peace and love. It was as if God was saying to me, “I know. On your own you are inadequate. Everyone is. I am not asking you be good enough for me. I’m telling you I love you, unconditionally.” In that moment I knew, as Saint Paul says, “Christ Jesus made me his own” (Philippians 3:12).

With this knowledge I’m invited into a different kind of striving, towards a goal that I know I will never fully reach in this life. I’m now striving to know Jesus better and to be more like Him. This is not out of a desperate need to be loved by Him, but out of joyful gratitude that I already am. And so I press on, however imperfectly and clumsily, to understand Him more, to love Him more so that I might see others the way He does, love others the way He does, and reflect His love to those around me.

Morgan MacKenzie

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