The Long Game

A Reflection on the Second Reading for September 15th, 2019:
Twenty-fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time

1 Timothy 1.12-17

Beloved: I am grateful to Christ Jesus our Lord, who has strengthened me, because he judged me faithful and appointed me to his service, even though I was formerly a blasphemer, a persecutor, and a man of violence.

But I received mercy because I had acted ignorantly in unbelief, and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.

The saying is sure and worthy of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners — of whom I am the foremost.

But for that very reason I received mercy, so that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display the utmost patience, making me an example to those who would come to believe in him for eternal life.

To the King of the ages, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honour and glory forever and ever. Amen.

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Patience is a virtue, or so we are often told. It's a challenging one. In the always-on, super-connected, point-and-click world we live in, instant gratification is highly valued and we really, really don't like waiting. Or at least I don't. And yet, I think we all understand that there is value and beauty in patience. We know it's a good thing. It's good for us, it's good for those around us, and it points to something (or Someone) beyond us that is Good.   


Whenever I read the New Testament I find the early Christians endlessly encouraging. God was so near to them and they experienced God profoundly. Jesus (who was and is "God with us") had literally just been with them — in the flesh. He had just walked the earth, and He had turned the world upside down. Yet, they screwed up… a lot. They made mistakes, they got in trouble, they fought with each other, their faith faltered, and they doubted God. In short, they were a lot like me. In spite of all this, God was patient with them. In this passage Saint Paul identifies himself as a "foremost" sinner and an example of Jesus' "perfect patience" to all those who would believe in Him (1 Tim 1:16).


I've been a believer (and a doubter) for a long time. I tend to get frustrated and impatient with myself when I seem to be making the same mistakes and learning the same lessons over and over. This spring I went on a silent retreat. I spent a week not talking with a bunch of Jesuits. One of the themes that I kept encountering in the silence was the depth of God's love for us. He loves us so much that we really can't understand it.  

"He loves us so much that we really can't understand it."

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Anthony de Mello, a Jesuit author, writes "Behold the One beholding you and smiling.” We're invited to see ourselves the way God sees us. God says of Jesus when He is baptized “This is my Son, the Beloved, with whom I am well pleased” (Matt 3:17). It's interesting that God says this before Jesus' ministry has started. He's pleased with Jesus because of who He is — His Son — not because of what He does. And when we become Christians God says the same thing of us: this is my daughter, my kid, the beloved with whom I am well pleased. We don't need to earn God's love, we just have to accept it. De Mello is inviting us to reflect on just how much God loves us. Look at the One looking at you with a smile on His face. Look at the One looking at you with love. Look at the One looking at you happy with what He sees. 


I came away from that week with a renewed sense of God's immense love for each of us. And I came away with a willingness to be more patient with myself as I walk this path to understand this love and to be more like Jesus. Conversion is a lifelong process and God is, thankfully, playing the long game with each of us. He definitely is with me. ​


​Morgan MacKenzie

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