You Are Good

A Reflection on the Psalm for July 14th, 2019:
Fifteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time

Psalm 19

R. The precepts of the Lord are right, and give joy to the heart.

The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul; the decrees of the Lord are sure, making wise the simple. R.

The precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandment of the Lord is clear, enlightening the eyes. R.

The fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever; the ordinances of the Lord are true and righteous altogether. R.

More to be desired are they than gold, even much fine gold; sweeter also than honey, and drippings of the honeycomb. R.

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There I lay, in a university dorm room, for a Catholic youth conference. I couldn’t help but think of the contrast between the state of my heart now, and how bruised and broken it was the last time I slept in a university dorm. Twenty years have gone by, and there have been many peaks and valleys. As I laid in this familiar setting, thinking of the many foolish things I have done, I contemplated the ways in which my wrong turns had formed and shaped me. My self image was shattered in those days. I lacked self-confidence. I carried deep pain and anger as though they were appendages—as much a part of me as any organ or limb. One wrong turn led to another, and another.

Today though, very little remains of that misshapen version of myself. But even still, God continues to reveal and heal the malformations that have clung to me over the years.

During praise and worship earlier that night, the speaker guided our prayer. He invited us to think about the false images we have of ourselves that God wants to free us from. As I prayed, every harsh word ever said to me, every painful self-image, every lie ever told to me, and every lie I ever told myself, came floating up out of some deep dark cave I didn’t realize still existed. As they floated up to the surface where the Light could shine on them, my Father, because He is a good Father, told me something that countered and amputated each of the distorted images that had become so familiar I didn’t even realize they didn’t belong. He told me, "You are good." 

The only difference between who I was twenty years ago and who I am now is my acknowledgement of the Good; my awareness and acceptance of Christ in me. And the difference between who I was when I first met Jesus and who I am today is my growth in observance of His ordinances. All those false images I carried with me found their existence in large part through my reckless behaviour. Even now, if I find myself all twisted up, I can be sure I am out of  alignment with His will. Contrary to popular belief, and in the topsy-turvy way that He often teaches us, our joy lies in our obedience to Him. He knows what we need. He created us, after all. ​And He is Good.

​Lori MacDonald

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